Thursday, June 23, 2005

Give great lip

Hola mis amigas! First off, thanks so much for all the congratulatory emails about my article--it was nice to know I didn't actually sound like a bi-polar Fascist. Second of all, all of your emails attempting to answer June's trivia question have been endlessly entertaining and hopeless wrong! I'm kidding...a couple of you got it right, but the first to answer was a lovely, um, human being (?) whose screen name is MALCAJ. Congrats, doll, and please hit me back with your name and address so I can send you your hard-earned prize (and also because I'm dying to know your gender).

So, girls, lips have been on my mind. As Picasso-esque as that visual may be. See, it's atrociously hot and humid here in Manhattan--my hair is enormous, I'm constantly sweating, and totally nude isn't naked ENOUGH while I sleep. The last thing on my mind are smokey eyes and Alexis Carrington-contoured blush, but if I've learned one thing in my years in beauty, its that NO ONE can go absolutely makeup-free. We all need a little something to look finished, clean, effortlessly sexy. And in weather this brutal, the most fuss-free feature to makeover is your mouth. As your friendly lipgloss/lipstick/lipstain/lipbalm connoisseur, I've tried them all, and from me to you--these nine pout-inducing products are the best on the market (its odd, but sometimes ten just doesn't happen. You can't force magic).

Oh, and your man can thank me for the ninth.

1.) REVLON SUPER LUSTROUS LIPGLOSS IN RAISIN GLAZE: I have five of these in stock in my underwear drawer, just in case the shade's ever discontinued. Its gives a perfect sheer, rosy-golden shine that's great for everyday [SHEER SHEEN].
2.) SMITH'S ROSEBUD SALVE: The cultest of all cult lip products, this soothing, rose-scented hydrator cures chapped lips and comes in a glamorously vintage little pot (the salve was first made in 1892). Also works as a cuticle moisturizer in a pinch! [FANCY LIP BALM]
3.) MAC TINTED LIP CONDITIONER SPF 15 IN BAUMY BRONZE: Leave it to the MAC geniuses to come up with buttery lip treatment that also leaves the sheerest wash of shimmery color. And the vanilla scent is to die. [HINT OF A TINT TREATMENT]
4.) CLINIQUE COLOR SURGE IMPOSSIBLE GLOSSY IN CREAM SODA: ThIs juicy, punchy bronzy-melon gives an anything-but-sheer, full-color finish that instanly brightens up any complexion. And inexplicably, it makes you look tan. [MAJOR DRAMA]
5.) VINCENT LONGO LIP & CHEEK GEL STAIN IN NEO AURA: For a 24/7 situation, this rosy neutral stain is just the thing. Swipe it on (quick, though, because it won't come off before 2010), wait a couple seconds for it to dry, and follow with a clear gloss to add shine. [OUT-ALL-NIGHT COLOR]
6.) ELIZABETH ARDEN EIGHT-HOUR-CREAM LIP PROTECTANT STICK SPF 15: Celebrity makeup artist's had been using Elizabeth Arden's 8 Hour Cream facial moisturizer as a secret weapon to hydrate lips for so long that finally Arden developed its own lip product. And, oh, its REVELATORY. The solid chapstick comes in a fabulous roll-up lipstick tube and leaves lips supple, smooth and shiny, shiny, shiny. Try the tinted shades too--plum, chestnut, and blush. Love. [SUPER-SHINY CHAPSTICK]
7.) CARGO DAILY GLOSS: If you're a girl on the go, you'll love these dime-sized, individual sealed, tearaway pouches of single-dose lip gloss. You get a 30-day supply of three different looks-perfect-on-everyone shades that you can literally stick in your pocket. [TRAVEL-SIZE CHIC]
8.) LANCOME JUICY ROUGE SHINY LIPSTICK IN BROWNIE: We all wear gloss these days, but there's something to be said for a fabulous lipstick, and last year Lancome came out with the best lipstick on the planet. Juicy Rouge has the coverage of a lipstick, but the shiny, glassy finish of a gloss. Its slightly sheer, slightly shimmery, and all good. [GLOSSY LIPSTICK]
9.) LIP VENOM: If you just started sleeping with someone, YOU NEED THIS. You know what its like when you first start spending the night and don't want the guy to see you looking busted, only radiantly luminous--but it would be ridiculous to break out a lipstick immediately after sex or the second you wake up? Well, its all about this teeny vial of cinammon and ginger-spiked, ultra-spicy gloss. It increases the circulation in your lips, plumping them up and creating a natural rosy flush. Your lips will look outrageously sultry, but in a natural, I'm-always-this-stunning way. And you can wildly make-out without getting lipgloss all over him. [SEX WALKING]


Blogger Sid said...

Thanks for the tips! I was just planning to go hunt for a good summer, sun-blocking lippy. Mac sounds like a winner. Like I need an excuse to head for MAC.

7:25 PM  
Blogger MalcaJ said...

wow i am so excited..i am female malcaj=malca jamaya lol@humanbeing email

1:18 PM  
Blogger Funkeedva said...

OOOH! I love love love Sebastian Trucco lipgloss in Wild Thing as well as Vincent Longo lipgloss in Pompeii! A girl after my own heart. Now if I just got around to reading your book...I sucketh! I knoweth :)

2:34 PM  
Blogger Glam Mama said...

Hey Tia,

I would love to get some real world (profashional) advice from you. If you could email me, of course if you had the time to do so. My email is


11:17 AM  
Blogger **Christen** said...

I love that lip venom and the Rosebud Salve is definitely a staple product

3:23 PM  
Blogger Shelia said...

I'll be trying the MAC Baumy Bronze. I might as well, I use the rest of their products (smile).

11:53 AM  
Anonymous MSBITCH.YOUR .COM said...

hello i liked your thing but as far as me i have my own.

3:26 AM  
Anonymous Miele Fiere said...

I thought I was the only one stocking up on Raisin Glaze. I keep adding to my stash every time Savon/Osco does the BOGO-lol. Don't sleep on L'Oreal Color Juice--same as Juicy Tubes but only like 7 bucks! Especially Butterscotch Drop-yummy!

10:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


6:50 AM  

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