Friday, April 25, 2008

The Nose Knows


















Hey ladies,
Welcome to my crazy. Yesterday, a well-traveled, eagle-eyed SYB Babe named Tisha Gibb sent me an utterly mystifying email. Apparently, Tisha's an Accidental Diva fan whose followed my career since I was a beauty editor at Glamour (this is important information). While innocently visiting an amiga in Panama, she happened to hit a local mall and came across an ad for special clips that make your nose smaller...and guess whose alleged "before and after" photo was accompanying the ad?! MINE! Tisha recognized the randomly random picture of me, which ran in Glamour when I was, like, 24. Please, girls, help me with this. How did that shot wind up in Panama? Does my God-given nose look like an "after" photo, post-clip rehabilitation? I'm a tad offended...I mean, I've devoted a good decade to helping women feel hot and sexy in their own skin, and now I'm unwittingly endorsing some loco anglify-your-nariz scheme? The nerve! My attorney sister, Devon/Brownie, is whipping up the cease and desist letter as we speak!

At the same time, though, I think this whole thing is profoundly hilarious and I kind of want to get the ads printed out on business cards. What do you think?

xoxo,
Tia

36 Comments:

Blogger Elle* said...

WOW...I would be aghast! Panama???!

10:34 AM  
Anonymous tabitha said...

I'm actually sickened by this in a way. On one hand, the fact that they used your photo without permission is unacceptable. On the other, the fact that company would make such a product in this day and age angers me to no end. Is there really a market for this? Do we really still hate ourselves that much?

On another note: you better check to make sure someone hasn't put your picture on anything else. That's the only thing you KNOW of, na' mean?

10:43 AM  
Blogger Fabulista said...

Tia, that is beyond HILAR and yet totally unacceptable. I hope your nariz isn't on parade in other countries!

11:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is upsetting because at the root of this ad is the notion that black features are not attractive. It also upsets me because we as women buy into this to some extent. For years I spent every Sunday morning at a Dominican salon getting my hair blown out straight. I know some will argue that they straighten their hair because it makes it easier to manage, it's more professional, or just like the way their hair looks straight. But we all know the root of our hair issues stem from being told that in order to appear beautiful, we must straighten it.

11:30 AM  
Blogger Divine Blackness said...

Whaaat? This is awful and I would be insulted, as well. Panama? I mean, really... Many blessings with handling that.

Anon's points are....on point.

11:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

unfortunately, this is the culture in which many latin american countries are raised in. white features are still much more desired and products like this or lightning creams and relaxers are very popular over there. in america i would like to think that this wouldn't be a public ad, but in latin america this is quite common and deeply rooted in how these countries were developed and the notion that "white is right" being ingrained in the mind of the people. they are definitely behind in the times but it just really shows how much we've developed in america where at least we're fighting against this notion. in these other countries the majority of the people still feel that way. its hard to believe anything else is beautiful other than what you see on t.v. especially when people tell you, you have to look a ceratin way. being from a latin american country it saddens to me think we have still a long way to go.

11:52 AM  
Blogger Areina said...

Cuz- I dunno... Panama? Like Panama-Panama? Like where your poppa dukes in law is from? This is seriously odd... Of course, i would be pissed that my photo was being used without permission number one, and for sure I would be DOUBLY, no, TRIPLE pissed that it was being used to promote such a bone headed notion. Make your nose smaller? What the eff kinda crud is that? And in PANAMA????!!! NO ME GUSTA!!!!!!!!

12:19 PM  
Blogger Always In Style said...

In a word: yikes!

You sound like you're dealing with it well though, hope it works out for you.

12:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow that is the craziest thing ever! What is wrong with people, but at least you are seeing the humor in the situation...and hey at least you know you have a following overseas as weird as it might be.

1:49 PM  
Blogger yummy411 said...

WOW TIA!! THAT'S UBER WIERD TO SEE YOUR FACE ON THAT AD!.. however, to see the ad isn't weird =(

2:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

tia, did you have a nose job?

4:48 PM  
Anonymous Wes said...

That's crazy... It's kind of funny but at the same time it's scary!! I mean, what are the chances of someone's face ending up on a 'nariz' package in Panama??!!

12:38 AM  
Blogger Dollfaced Rebel said...

Omgosh... It's so lucky that she happened upon this. It would have taken me a while. I would have been like, "NO way... Wait... No... Maybe... Can't be...:: whips out Accidential Diva, Looks at Cover flaps, does a side-by-side Comparison::... IT IS!"

8:06 AM  
Anonymous Aziza Ayo said...

Woo...that's kinda creepy! I hope everything gets figured out :)

11:13 AM  
Blogger Kiss Kiss Beauty said...

omg. This is wrong on so many levels, as other readers have pointed out. The thing I'm wondering that hasn't yet been discussed is...does anyone really believe that putting a clip on your nose will permanently alter its shape??? This product insults not only the looks but the intelligence of its target market. Ugh.

4:20 PM  
Blogger Dominican Enigma said...

Oh my God! That's beyond scary.But kind of hysterical at the same time.

5:24 PM  
Anonymous Joy said...

This is hilarious... yet frightening!

7:44 PM  
Anonymous Manillo said...

some freaky ish at best. i guess that's the price you pay for being famous, aye tia? i'd still die content just to be able to spend a day in your shoes. :)

however, i agree with anon poster who mentioned that the underlying message in all of this is that anything black is wrong. what's wrong with our broad noses? please do put a stop to this tia. no business cards to get them publicity. thanks.

8:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG! That's insane. But this happens alot with those handbills that you get for clubs and their special nights where they will have a pretty chick on the handbill or flyer and it will be just some random pic off the internet and the girl won't even know that she's on it.

5:46 PM  
Blogger divasoul said...

Wow that's hysterical. And scary. And what are the odds someone would know it's you and know how to reach you to LET you know?! Wow...

6:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about the before picture??? Holy photoshop Batman lol!

7:15 PM  
Blogger Tisha said...

Tisha here- I couldn't believe it when I saw the photo! I knew it was Tia and could not wait to tell her her pic was being used this way(mind you I was scared to get a picture because of a previous camera issue in customs,long story) so she could take care of it. Tia- I'm glad your sister is on top of this. I will have my friend check back in a coulple of weeks to make sure this mess of an ad is taken down.

5:31 PM  
Anonymous Alyssa Johnson said...

Wow that's a pretty funny story (by funny I mean weird). I ho.pe no one actually buys that product, plus isn't that illegal it's false advertisement.

9:46 PM  
Anonymous Shay the Panface said...

11:30 am, please dont start with the straight hair business.

i hate it when people say relaxed hair is clue to a secret longing to be european or look european or not look black, etc. as a sista with frighteningly thick hair, i always relaxed mine so that i could control it. i love a good afro or a delicious set of dreads, but for lack of manageability of the former and lack of diversity in styling of the latter (dont front), i choose to relax my hair not to give in to societal pressures or insecurities, but just because its easier.
nobody more than me loves my dark brown skin (which i actually do tan for color and texture), my asiatic eyes and even the nosebridge i dont have which makes my little button nose and my face look flat (they call me panface in the hood), because they speak of my honduran heritage and all the origins i have as a result of the imperialism that brought over the attitudes of self hate as well as my vibrant culture and exotic phenotype.
its unfair to discount taking advantage of the versatility in "nappy hair" as an insecurity.

1:35 PM  
Blogger Miss Angel said...

Speechless...

4:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

1:35pm (I rather not call you Shay the Panface),

People who say they chemically straighten their hair in order to better manage it is like women who say they got their "deviated septum" fixed in order to breathe better. Once again, we as women make these choices in order to fit a European standard of beauty. Just like the perception that a wide nose is unattractive there is a perception that thick hair needs to be tamed (enter the straighter.

Thanks for your comment, I always enjoy hearing diverse opinions!

11:12 PM  
Blogger My Inner French Girl said...

Dear Tia,

God, that's both horrifying and funny.

When I moved here to the States after living in the Philippines back in the mid-80's, I happened to open to the back pages of the Dallas Observer (sort of the Village Voice of the Big D) and found a small ad for one of those "escort" services that promote their "Asian beauties." I was mystified and shocked to find that the photo they used to accompany the ad was of the biggest concert/recording artist in the Philippines at the time. It was a familiar promo shot for one of her albums.

Anyway, I knew that there was no way this millionaire entertainer was offering her "escort services" for some sleazy Dallas company. I suspected that they just lifted the photo from some random magazine or ad and used it as theirs. Pretty bad business. I'm sure it happens more often now than it did back then, what with the easy access to billions of images on the Internet.

I'm sorry you ended up being a victim of this, but I doubt you'd be able to do anything about it. I guess you can just chalk it up as a funny anecdote.

Salut,
Marjorie

1:06 PM  
Blogger Notoso said...

i can't believe this has gone to the perm versus natural. i for one like a saying by Erykah Badu, which goes, "every perm aint for the fall and, every dread aint down for the cause."

7:12 PM  
Anonymous SugarBee said...

Anonymous: I don't agree. Women with straight hair, especially white women, can get their hair permed, colored, or whatever, and no one tries to apply a psychological motive; women of color should be able to go straighter or lighter or anywhichway without being judged for it. I have two half black sisters. Both straighten their hair because they like to be able to run a comb through it and style it. It's pretty prejudiced of you to assume that you know their motives.

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