Don't say cheap...INEXPENSIVE sounds prettier

Hey ladies,
I enjoy that Gnarls Barkley song, "Crazy." I enjoy the name Gnarls Barkley, even more. I enjoy the fact that i opened Us Weekly and learned that Halle Berry and I both own the same Diane Von Vurstenberg white eyelet sundress. I enjoyed my visit with RuPaul on CosmoRadio yesterday, because he revealed that his great, big, delicious hair is, in fact, the result of TWO wigs. I enjoy taking out the trash in my teeny-tiny terrycloth shorts and pretending to be outraged when the guys refacing the brownstone across the street get all saucy with me. I enjoy eating Doritos at 3am, naked, in my pitch-black kitchen. I enjoy the fact that it's balmy enough to have an outdoor cafe moment, and I enjoy my new highlights (mainly because, this time, I sought professional help rather than slapping them in myself and accidentally falling asleep while the dye slowly roasts my hair to death). I especially enjoy that TODAY I FINISHED MY TEEN NOVEL!!! WOO-HOO!! Girls, I'm having a damn good summer, how 'bout yourselves?!

So. let's get down to it, shall we? As I scanned your comments trying to pick the most pressing beauty dilemmas to solve this week, I stumbled upon an email from a blushing violet named Shimmerliciousdiva. If you missed her comment , here it is:

Hey Tia,
I was wondering if you could do a lot of us a huge favor. I would love to buy Dior, YSL, and all of these other high end beauty products, but for a chica on a student budget ($0), it is not possible. Could you pick your favorite drug store beauty products for brown girls? Maybe you could do something like "as a substitute for MAC blush in Raizin, use ...." Tia, if you could do this for the kinda broke girls trying to Shake our Beauties, I, as well as many others would greatly appreciate it (I know that I am not the only one in this situation).
--Shimmerliciousdiva

Indeed, you're so not the only one in this situation. I mean, please, I can barely afford the goodies I talk about. It's just that I suffer from a very peculiar sickness in which the afflicted value fancy eyeshadow packaging over things like, well, LUNCH. That's why, this week it's all about those high-quality/low-cost, chic-n-cheap, I-can't-believe-it's-not-Dior products. And they're by no means less glamorous than their flashier sisters, it's just that you won't have to take out a second mortgage to buy lipliner. The only thing about low-budget beauty is that there really are some things you just HAVE to spend money on--like foundation, concealer, and more often than not, fragrance. Those products are just too easy to get wrong, and no one wants a clown-like complexion or to smell like the fitting room at Contempo Casuals.

But first, it's time for TIA'S WEEKLY....WHY! Now, last week's WHY I was searching for an explanation as to why every grown-ass woman I know is counting the minutes until "Making the Band 3" comes on. Just to be clear, I AM ONE OF THESE WOMEN!! Most definitely. That's the problem (by the way, what do we think of Aubrey's new brunette situation?). Anyway, this week, the question is--why can't everybody just leave Britney Spears alone? Yeah, she's total trash and her taste in husbands is criminal, but what new mom who WOULDN'T come out looking like a thundering idiot if she were constantly being photographed? I shudder to think what the paparazzi would catch if they followed my ass around, 24/7. I mean, last night I bit my own toenails. How's that for a Star cover story? "Brooklyn Writer Bites Toenails; Is Shocked When Her Veneers Fall Out." Come on guys, leave her alone. Sean P. will be fine. He's gangsta. You can tell because he wears his baseball caps cocked-to-the-side, just so.

love,
tia

TIA'S TOP FIVE BUDGET BEAUTY FINDS

1.) LIP GLOSS
INSTEAD OF: Chanel Glossimer in Zanzibar ($24.50)
TRY: Revlon Super Lustrous Lipgloss in Raisin Glaze ($6.19)
WHY: Seriously devoted Shake Your Beauty-istas will know that my love affair with Raisin Glaze is passionate and permanent. The rosy-golden-brown-ish sheen is so excellent that I keep five extras in my underwear drawer, just in case the shade's ever discontinued. Somehow, it manages to be everyday-natural, yet twinkly and shiny enough for cocktails and spicy dates.

2.) EYE SHADOW
INSTEAD OF: Shiseido The Makeup Hydro-Powder Eye Shadow in Goldlights ($28.82)
TRY: Mark I-Sheer Creamy Eye Shadow in Mousse ($5)
WHY: I adore Shiseido's and Mark's cream shadow for the same reason: Their super-light, whipped texture makes for the prettiest, most subtle golden glaze--it's not a heavy, opaque metallic. Also, the twinkly shade looks fabulous on all brown skin tones--from the fairest to the darkest--and whether you go high-priced or inexpensive, both products are equally as luxe!! Bonus: Both are totally crease-proof, which is genius in the summer.

3.) MASCARA
INSTEAD OF: Shu Uemura Fiber Xtension Lengthening Mascara in Xtra Black ($23.00)
TRY: Jane Hi-Fiber Mascara ($3.99)
WHY: Fiber mascaras are the HUGEST trend in lash-love these days. Almost every brand has them, from MAC and Maybelline to Too-Faced and Lorac. Why so fab? They contain itsy micro-fibers that coat the lash and stick to the ends of your lashes, extending them out farther...thus, giving the illusion of lush, sexy, false lashes. It's insane, the difference between fiber mascaras and regular ones. Most of them are dual-ended, with the fiber solution on one end (you put in on first), and the mascara on the other. But both Shu Uemura and Jane blend the fibers into the formula, which takes out a step (yay!) and gives the sickest lashes, ever. You'd think that for 4 bucks the Jane one must be tacky, or clumpy, or wrong somehow--but let me tell you, beauty editors are obsessed with it, and these folks have access to the best of everything. If I rave any more I'll have to ask Jane for commission, so here's where it ends.

4.) BLUSH
INSTEAD OF: MAC Powder Blush in Raizin ($17.50)
TRY: Iman Luxury Blushing Powder in Cinnamon ($9.99)
WHY: MAC Raizin is so popular because the sheer fig-rust shade gives an incredibly natural flush to medium to dark brown skin (it's lovely on fairer skin too, just with a lighter hand). Iman's version is equally as warm and toasty and flattering--somehow, it even gives your skin a sexy, outdoorsy radiance, like you've just played volleyball or something outside all day. If you hate to sweat as much as I do, this illusion is especially seductive.

5.) BATH AND BODY KIT
INSTEAD OF: Kiehl's Basics Kit ($66)
TRY: Burt's Bees Head-to-Toe Starter Kit ($11)
WHY: Kiehl's Basics Kit is totally legendary! You get all their classics--stuff like Mango Bath & Shower Cleanser, Creme de Corps Body Cream and the coconut-scented Amino Acid Shampoo--in the cutest little case (its a great gift, but even greater to receive). Love, love, love, but the price is kind of crazy if you're on a budget. Good thing Burt's Bees, the yummy homeopathic line that manages to be both boutique-y and budget at the same time, invented their Starter Kit. Believe it or not, their bath-and-body kit is equally as decadent as Kiehls', and it comes with TONS more stuff! Just a sampler: you get their famous Beeswax Lip Blam, Orange Essence Facial Cleanser, Avocado Butter Hair Treatment (fab for dry ends), Citrus Facial Scrub, Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream, Milk & Honey Body Lotion, Peppermint Body Soap and Banana Hand Creme...and soooo much more. It's boggles my mind that such luxury is available for the price of chicken fingers at Friday's, but there you go.